05 April 2012

The S.S. Elisabeth Sales Into the Sunset

The other night I went to see a horrendously bastardized interpretation of Wuthering Heights with two friends: J and N. After the film we got to talking about dating. J is in a serious almost-marriage relationship. N is single and has a bit more experience at the dating game than I do. Because N has tried online dating before, I asked if she had any advice. She said to trust my gut. Did she have any odd stories, I asked, because I sure was starting to collect them.

A few days into my membership with The Big E, I got an introductory set of questions from a guy in Pennsylvania. At first glance, Pennsylvania didn't seem a bit like someone I would go for, but I am taking an extremely open-minded approach to this whole online thing. So I played ball and answered his questions. (p.s. a lot of guys have asked about how often I lose my temper...interesting) We went back and forth answering generic questions about ourselves, as you do with The Big E, for a couple of days. And then, I asked him about a boat.

Specifically, I asked him what he would name a yacht if he were given one tomorrow. I also asked where he would take said yacht. I thought this would be a sort of interesting question for him to answer given all of the incredibly boring questions we'd been throwing back and forth. And I thought it might show if he had a sense of humor.

His reply went something like this: If I were given a yacht tomorrow, I would name it Sunrise because I believe in new beginnings and that would be such a great new beginning. I love this question, Elisabeth, it is so clever. Actually, now that I think about it, if you were my wife, I would name the boat after you. Elisabeth would make a nice name for a boat. Have you heard the song by The Counting Crows called, 'Goodnight, Elisabeth'? It's really good. I'm going to listen to it now."

His wife? Um, Pennsylvania, we're in the ICEBREAKER stage of the game. Really? Wife? Oh brother.

So, I told N and J, that happened. Being the kind guy that he is, J asked if I would like for him to accompany me on any dates. "That's nice of you," I replied, "but Pennsylvania lives on the other side of the country, so there won't be any dates with him anytime soon. Plus having a chaperone might be a bit overkill. Maybe."

N's advice? Be open, that's good and all, but more than anything trust your gut. And, maybe put Pennsylvania in the no-way-on-earth column.


Molly said...

Dave asked if he could call me his girlfriend the 2nd time we hung out (and the 1st time was a 40 minute coffee I squeezed in right before pilates, lol). Did I have a minor heart attack and almost say no? Of course. My point? Overzealous men that love you too much are the best kind! :). I'm glad I said yes!

Elisabeth said...

Molly, you're too sweet! And you have a good point.